And when you finally
call,
Moments or seasons or
years from now,
And you ask me how I’ve
been,
I’ll say I've been
fine.
There were nights so
dark,
I couldn't see through
the maze
To find my way to
breathe again.
I was fine.
I remember my voiceless
screams,
So that I wouldn’t wake
up the nightmares
I had so much
difficulty putting to sleep.
I was fine.
The glass on the floor,
blurred
With the scars on my
wrists
While lying upside
down.
I was fine.
The sweat on my forehead,
The salt from my sunken
cheeks,
The taste of blood in
my mouth.
I was fine.
Reaching for air and
grabbing
The hollow bubble of
your memories,
Stinging my pink
flakes.
I was fine.
Choking on my own
cough,
My throat clenching
with
The memory of your
laughter.
I was fine.
The blames, the fights,
the marks,
The letters, the vows,
the stars,
The incomplete
bucket-list.
I was fine.
Our songs, the broken
snow globe,
Our places, the cracked
lampshade,
Our secrets, the empty
couch.
I was fine.
A child, a man, a
shadow,
The person, my person,
Lost, betrayed, gone.
I was fine.
When you ask, I’ll say,
With love and fire in
my eyes,
“Thank you for asking,
I've been fine.”
- Sayantani Sarkar.
