Goodbye.

The last night of the year…

This year began with the winter, and it’s ending with another.

Cold it has been indeed.

Did the summer leave its shade? Did the fall feel red?

You don’t remember, do you?

Coffees and cupcakes and headlines and scars; it’s all a piled-up blur.

Lost dreams and crippled hearts, and still wishing on the wishing star,

For the one smile and that one love.

The final goodbye and the warm hug.

The snow on the windshield and the sun on your shoulder.  

The fireplace and the crumpled letter.   

The last night of the year. And the last glass of wine.

Goodbye, 2014. See you in a broken dream, maybe? 

What Passed Us By

2014 is almost over, and as we descend into its last week, looking back makes me reflect upon the one very important thing I learnt this year: relationships are fleeting, and very fragile. There are certain people in our lives who we feel will never leave us, certain relationships we think will last forever; that’s an illusion. It’s human tendency to believe that if a friendship has lasted for 8-10 years, then it’ll last a lifetime. Sorry to burst the bubble, my friend.  

I've realized that the duration of a relationship depends not on time, but on effort. No relation can last until both the sides invest time, effort, care and will into it. Emotions can’t, and shouldn't be forced. Or else it’s just a vegetable life you start leading, and eventually the bond starts to rotten and slowly deteriorate. But don’t upset yourself if your best friend found a new best friend, or if your boyfriend found someone with longer legs; because this is all a part and parcel of this roller coaster ride we call Life. Let go of the ones who want to leave. The only people who matter are the ones who stay. Consider yourself blessed if you have atleast one person to talk to at 4am, when your mind is clogged with incoherent thoughts.

Another thing I realized, for the zillionth time, is that the only people who will love you and be with you no matter what, are your parents. They have seen you at your best and worst. They didn't leave then, and they won’t leave now, or ever. They are the only ones who will love you unconditionally and selflessly; whose love for you will never change. Their love will ask for neither reciprocation nor reason nor proof. All they wish for is a little respect. They don’t beg for it, but they sure as hell deserve it. They’re the only ones who truly deserve it. Theirs is the love you should value the most. Because this is the only bond that will remain when everything else shatters and disappears. This is the only bond that defines permanence. It’ll be there; it always has, it always will. In photographs and pancakes and snow globes and freckles and secret santas. 

Have a nice dinner with your mom and dad this New Year’s eve. Okay? 

Lots and lots of love,

Creative Insanity. 

Winter is Here!

Decembers are so special. Not only because it means Christmas is around the corner and the holiday aura floats in the air, but also because it means the winter breeze will be grazing your cheeks for quite a few weeks.

It also means late mornings and super-lazy afternoons,

And warm tea and hot chocolate,

Dog-eared books and snuggly blankets,

Having ice-cream at the beach,

Blue music and golden sunsets,

Embellishing the Christmas tree with fairy lights,

Kids putting out empty socks with a heart that still believes,

While some turning the night-lamp on hoping for a miracle.

All this, and so much more.

A whole season of snowy possibilities.

Happy holidays, everyone! J

Lots of love,

Creative Insanity.

The Blurred Frame

I want someone who plans out every weekend perfectly,

And then ends up doing something completely different.

Someone who is fanatic about his favourite fandoms,

And who gets excited about food.

Someone who is passionate about his work,

Whose eyes twinkle when he talks about his dreams.

Someone who appreciates Bukowski’s poetry,

And understands my obsession with Plath.

One who gets my Harry Potter references,

And re-reads the stories with me.

One who counts fall’s fallen leaves,

And makes delicious lemon tea.

Who doesn’t mind spending the Sunday at home,

Away from the citylights.

Who would rather watch some grey movies,

With board games and shared silences.

With whom I can walk on the beach barefoot,

And maybe dance the night away.

With whom the dates become anniversaries,

And surprises become traditions.

Someone who sees both my black and white sides,

And still wants to hug me through the rough tide.

Someone with whom the skin turns old,

And the conversations still never end.

   - Sayantani Sarkar. 

Cartoon-ish.

She’s just a shadow of the girl she used to be,
A tiny piece among the smithereens.
An echo of the once curved lips,
A distorted picture, grey and crumpled.

She looks into the mirror,
A stranger waves back.
She can’t remember the marks,
Only the scars can she recall.

She has seen love,
She has felt pain.
She has lost so much,
Emptiness fills her up.

Intimacy scares her now,
Voids seem friendlier.
A voice calls out to her,
But she’s too far to hear.

She’s trying to find the beautiful yesterday,
While time races her by.
She can’t go back, she can’t stay the same.
She’s just a shadow of the girl she used to be.

 
  - Sayantani Sarkar